Friday, September 19, 2008

24. cheese state

I finally arrived in Madison. Via Johannesburg, via Dakar, via Atlanta, but I arrived. My heartbeat was skyrocketing. Wow. It was real, in just a minute or two I would see the Beautiful Boy, be able to kiss and hold him. If I wanted to? Gulp!

As I stepped off the plane I had a peculiar out-of-body sensation, wondering for a moment what the hell I was doing in Wisconsin of all places and who was this Boy I was expecting to be there, waiting with open arms? For ten years every day and most of my choices were obvious, predictable, inevitable. Now it was all wide open and I had no guarantees.

If I hadn’t spent so much time with Boy’s family and friends in his absence, I might have run away at this point! They were the only reassurance I had that he wasn’t just some callous heartbreaking stranger looking for a good time. I mean, I’d just flown halfway round the world on the strength of a delirious month spent together and a couple of phone calls! Well, maybe rather more than a couple. Regardless, there I was, entering the arrivals hall of a tiny airport in the Cheese State of America; I had no choice but to keep on walking into this unmapped future.

When I spotted him, my heart skipped a beat. Man, he was gorgeous! He looked younger than I remembered, and taller, and sweeter, and… shy! There were many words I could use to describe the Beautiful Boy, but shy had never been one of them. It entered my mind for the first time that this must be as daunting for him as it was for me. We shyly said hello, grinning, and then Beautiful Boy did what he does best. He kissed me till my toes curled up.

15 comments:

Cate Subrosa said...

*sigh*

Barefoot Billionaire said...

Wow, this must be love. I don't feel like kissing ANYBODY after such a long-haul flight!

Rachel said...

what guilty said. How come I keep writing that? x

Modelmental said...

gs, sigh sigh and sigh again... have a fab weekend!

barefoot, that's hilarious! ha-ha. though i did have a couple of hours in atlanta to acclimatise and refresh? i'm sure that helped.

rachel, cause guilty always says the right/witty/smart/empathic thing!

Unknown said...

toe-curling kisses... *sigh* indeed, Guilty!

Insight, Insanity, Imagination said...

you should write a book! This is good stuff... Im sad I'm going to be away from my computer all weekend because I don't know if I can wait til monday for more!

Jules said...

I absolutely can't wait to read what happens next . . . !

Anonymous said...

I just recently came across your blog (thanks to another fellow blogger) & am now addicted! #25 soon please, ASAP! I can't wait to hear of your exciting adventures in the cheese state!

Amber said...

aaah. So have found your blog and am officially addicted. In fact, SO addicted that I am usually a closet blog fan and have never actually COMMENTED on a blog before. I live several oceans away from my boy and therefore can relate to every long distance phone call, lengthy plane ride to random US destinations and the lovely lovely kiss at the end of it.

Except I have to wait another 4 months til I see my boy again...

(5 weeks ain't nothing baby) xox

Cyd said...

Eeeeek! The suspense is killing me. In the absolute best of ways. English Teacher has great kisses too....what's better than a kiss worthy of making you melt?

Melissa said...

Now it was all wide open and I had no guarantees.

How exciting. ;)

It entered my mind for the first time that this must be as daunting for him as it was for me.

That's very touching. How true.

Modelmental said...

Jessica, have I mentioned I love kissing?!?!

Iii, thanks! I'd love to put it in a book, make a movie, write a song, spread the word... it is my message and the message is love...

Jules, just hang in there, I'm not going anywhere, enjoying this way too much! Thank you!

Twinkle, yeah I knew the cheese state would grab you. Hie hie, I love it. Cheese state. Ha!

Alhamber, so glad you felt compelled to comment, it's fun isn't it? As for you long distance situation, aaaaaargh. Four months?!?! Is there a permanent end in sight to this madness? I'm sending you all my sympathy and support!

Cyd, have I mentioned ... kissing ... blah blah ... okay I'll admit, I'm addicted to kissing!

Melissa, thanks for understanding! :-)

Anonymous said...

Great work.

Modelmental said...

Ah thanks Zelda! Your comment made me re-visit this post, and I'm so glad I did. Oh sweet memories!

Anonymous said...

ek kan nie vinnig genoeg lees nie, is darem noual by .24... en nou huil ek. eks so sad, happy, emotional en lief ek kan nie eers se wat ek voel nie. julle't so wonderlike storie, daar moet n boek kom....definitief.