Wednesday, November 12, 2008

yesterday, today, tomorrow

Yesterday I wanted to cave under the pressure. I felt out of control, overwhelmed, unprepared and just swamped. I knew this was irrational and untrue, but I have a hard time managing my stress levels with cognitive reasoning. I'm working on it okay?

So I got a couple of things done, not the least of which was tasting and booking the fabulous cupcakes of Cape Town institution Charly's Bakery for our wedding cake. Their slogan is mucking afazing cakes. Nuff said.

Today I feel calm enough to think back nostalgically and reminisce over wonderful weddings gone by.

My dear friend Venus* from student days got married in April 2005 in her home town, a tiny little place in a vast semi-desert. The girl reflects the place she's from: warm, dramatic and uniquely beautiful with a heart as big as the wide African skies.

Venus and I had lost touch since studying together, living in different countries before everyone had Internet access at home. Finally we were both back home, she got engaged to her beautiful boyfriend of ten odd years and Nightingale (one of my best friends) was to be a bridesmaid. Venus was the first of my friends to get married in the big way; white dress, lots of bridesmaids, big reception. In the months leading up to her wedding, I was so excited to join in and help out in the search and planning efforts, she ended up asking me to be a bridesmaid too. I could also assist by doing her make-up for her, as there aren't too many professional make-up artists out in the Karoo desert!

The make-up and veil trial. I was so nervous to be responsible for her wedding pictures, luckily she's a natural beauty... I never let anyone else talk me into that again!

I can assure you that zero Internet research or blogging inspiration was involved in her wedding, but thinking back to the details today, that girl had some great style and intuition. She bought a dress off the rail at a weddingy chain store and we altered it a little bit with hand made rose corsages and a feathery beaded brooch. She also designed and made her own birdcage veil, years before I would know that's the name for it! We sat down together for a couple of days to make a rose brooch for every female guest and wrote and decorated table numbers, lists and menus ourselves. Each bridesmaid picked her own dress in a similar dusty pink colour and we accessorised it with a vintage feel.

All the guests stayed over on her parents' farm or guest farms in the area for the whole weekend and it was a wonderfully intimate, sincere, no-fuss wedding. The entire ceremony and reception was planned for outside, under enormous trees in the desert sunshine. Everything went great throughout the ceremony (if you discount the fact that her veil blew off the second we got to the altar!) and off we went for pictures. The next minute a thunder storm drenched guests, tables, starters and bridal party to the bone. A nightmare in any bride-to-be's books, but somehow I don't remember Venus freaking out, not even just a little bit. I remember that it made for my favourite picture as we all ran into a little shed nearby, I remember us girls treating Venus to a luxurious bath and foot treatments the night before and I do remember dancing for hours after our little stint in the rain.

Years before the sexyredframe, there was the not-so-sexy black frame!

I absolutely love and adore this next picture. If you look closely you can see her darling father in tears at the big moment. Tears of happiness, I assure you as Venus, her boy and their angel son are a wonderful example of a beautiful family in love!

My favourite photographs follow. You can see how wet my arm is!

Killer legs, awesome photography.

All of which just reaffirms my current mission.

Tomorrow, I solemnly vow to stop feeling anxious, nervous or distressed about ANY of the silly party fluff surrounding our wedding next Saturday. I will truly stop and smell the rosy fragrance of this beautiful time in our lives and relish the thought of bringing all our favourite people together for one special day.


Abbie said...

This wedding looks like it was a blast! She was rockin'! You did an amazing job on the make-up.

(I know what you mean about the red frames... I have a pair, and I wear them so much more than my tortoise shell ones. It's like studious vs. badass.)

Stephanie @ Gossip. Style. Wed. said...

Her veil is. the. hotness.

And you will be brilliant. Love from the Midwest States.

Cassandra Allen said...

Great photos RF, really spontaneous and unposed. They're the best kind, in my opinion.
When in Seminyak, I highly reccommend a bar called Ku De Ta. It's quite the class for Semiyak! My friend and I stayed at Sofitel Seminak a few years ago and would walk along the beach in the evening to Ku De Ta and sip on their wonderful and unusual cocktails while sitting at the edge of the beach watching the sun set. Here's some photos if you're interested. There's 2 parts. We had so much fun in Bali. Hot hot hot!

Being Brazen said...

Love the photos of your friends wedding. So casual and pretty.

Good luck with not stressing. There really isnt any point. Juts enjoy every moment and if something goes wrong, it goes wrong. You are still marrying the love of your life no matter what :)

Kitty Cat said...

Well, all I can say is that stressing is natural. It's like we just can't help it, as brides to be. When I got married I gave up trying not to stress and just went with the nerves! Usually I'm a calm person but just before my wedding and on the day itself, my nerves were racked! But it all turned out fine anyway.

Rachel said...

I love the photos, and also that dress you are wearing.

Don't worry about stressing, it is normal. I can't believe you are getting married in a weeks time!


Tea and Adventures said...

Fantastic photos! and I just love your dress.
I think it's pretty normal to find it rather stressful, especially so close to the big day! But yes, enjoy the days running up to your wedding as much as you can.

Peonies and Polaroids said...

What a gorgeous wedding, gorgeous photos and gorgeous girlies!

Peonies and Polaroids said...

Oh, and I'm thrilled that you found cupcakes!

EliandMe said...

If you ever any cupcakes left over (unlikely I know), feel free to send me one!

Those pictures are amazing, truly inspirational.

AmyJean said...

Those pictures are AWESOME!

Anonymous said...

She is stunning as was her yours will be too!! Stress is such a natural part of this we may as well embrace it and go with it, eh?


Sarah said...

uh WOW - amazing makeup, wedding and photos are to die for! Fab work!

bekapaige said...

I love her veil!

No stress. Everything may not be perfect but it will all be beautiful!

Lisa D said...

Love the cupcake catch fraze. Mucking afazing. Genius.

Those pictures are gorgeous - you did an awesome job! Want to come to the midwest and do my make up some day when I get married? ha!

Try not to stress too much. I know you are hearing that from everyone & your mom, but it's so true. At the end of the day, it's all about you, your beautiful boy, and your fabulous friends & family, celebrating the beginning of an amazing life together!!

Hannah Noel said...

You, my friend, are seriously gorgeous beyond all reason!! Man, if only ... lol

That wedding looked freakin' awesome! I LOVED The style of the bridesmaids dresses and the wedding gown. Soo cute and retro!

Those are exactly the kind of photos I want at my wedding. Candid. Not cookie cutter.

DT said...

Those are really beautiful photo's! You will be stressed, you just need a little help - Maybe a large glass of cold white wine and lavender flowers under your pillow!
Just dont be hard on yourself ;-)

redframe said...

Abbie, thank you for complimenting the make-up. I've never been overly confident that it looks okay?
She's still rockin'!
Up the badass frames!

Stephanie, isn't it just?
Aw thanks! It helps!

Cassandra, yes I like it that way too! We've got ku de ta very high up on the priority list already and your pics look amazing! I'm so ready to go! Thanks so much for sharing! (Still can't get used to you being a brunette!!!)

Brazen, yep yep and yep. I'm doing better already!

Kitty thanks I know... I'm just usually a stressed person anyway so this is just overload! But I've gained some perspective, all good now!

Rachel, wasn't my dress just adorable? And such a bargain. I need to wear it again! Thanks for making me feel normal!

Tea, thanks I'm doing my best! Went shopping for his outfit with my Dad today and had a blast. Yay.

Peonies, I've been meaning to write a special post just for you, all about the cupcakes. I do think I'm slowly falling in lust with buttercream...

So glad you like the photos eliandme. I can't even tell you girls how budget friendly that whole wedding was!!! Cupcake leftovers will be a miracle. I'll have to send you one if it happens!

Amy, I know! And it was an amateur friend of mine! Will credit him properly soon. Ex complications...

Grosgrainbride, yeah going with the stress-flow is something I find very difficult to do. I tense up, freeze up, procrastinate, curl up into a ball and cry. Not too productive! But I'm trying!

Gee thanks Sarah!!!!

Beka, me too. And thanks, I know. I know. I know.

Lisa D thank you! If you give me enough warning I'll plan a mucking afazing roadtrip through the midwest and paint your face along the way... Yeah!

Thanks Hannah, my friend! I can't believe we were into vintage before we knew what vintage was. Hee hee. It was fab. And reportage style wedding photography? Adore it!

DT, help is on the way, bombshell landed and she's a bridesmaid extraordinaire! Yay. Can I switch the white for red and lavender for jasmine? Man I can be a picky bitch!
Ooh, you've hit a nerve. I AM THE HARDEST PERSON ON MYSELF I EVER KNEW. I'm more mad at myself for leaving things so late than at the fact that there's still things to be done. Dealing with it though. And breathe. xxx

Anonymous said...

Beautiful pictures and make up!

Random thought-you are super tall!

And I think it's normal for you to be stressing right now, it might actually be a little odd if you weren't! :)

Mary-Laure said...

She is SO beautiful! ANd the pictures convey a lot of joy and fun.
Keep us posted on your wedding too, please...

An Atlanta Bride said...

a-w-e-s-o-m-e pics!!

Ruby Slippers said...

I've just about caught up on your blog now! If you can stop stressing about the details from now until the day, you're a better woman than I, but you HAVE to try or you'll go crazy. I think I only flipped out in the last two days, and then on the day I was pretty much okay. Whoohoo for next week! I can't wait. Who is your photographer, by the way? You might have mentioned it before but I'm a newbie here :-)

DT said...

Absolutely! I love Jasmin - but lavender is very good for calming the nerves and helping you sleep!
You can do this and you will do it well and beautifully!